This film opens exactly the way it needs to, with Dolemite doing a Kung Fu demonstration during the opening credits while a theme song for The Human Tornado himself plays. Then we are quickly transported to the world of stand up. Dolemite does his normal thing, being as offensive as possible and making fun of his audience. One joke in particular is very confusing during this. I will have to paraphrase because in our modern SJW community, I would probably be considered racist for doing something as simple as quoting The Great Man that is Dolemite himself, but here is the joke. This guy interrupts him, and Rudy mentions this guy has to be the center of attention all the time. Then he states that he is the kind of guy that farts in the bathtub, then turns around and bites the bubbles. What does that mean exactly? I mean what kind of person is that supposed to be indicative of?
Well that's not important, because the movie starts up now. Dolemite is apparently pimping himself out now and a woman comes to him to get services during an event at Dolemite's Florida estate. Dolemite is a good guy who gives to the community and is donating his place to make a boy's home of some sort that sadly didn't raise enough funds to be built. Dolemite announces this and then goes back to give the woman some Tornado.
Some racist rednecks see the party and tell Sheriff Beatty who does a raid on Dolemite's place because he is also racist. During the raid the Sheriff finds his wife sleeping with Dolemite and orders his friend to shoot them. His friend starts with Beatty's wife and kills her with a shotgun. Dolemite retaliates with a handgun and kills the guy, then jumps of a nearby cliff and down a hill. The Bad Dolemite (bad meaning awesome) jumps naked too, and just to make sure you know he really did it, we get some instant replay action. We then get a funky car chase with some of the Sheriff's men, and it ends with Dolemite blowing up both his and their cars with a shotgun. Dolemite and his friends are left without transportation so they hijack a gay guy's car and take him with to California. This gay guy is kind of offensive and annoying so I will assume he is also insane and that is why. But Dolemite is pretty nice to him and not only takes him with but gives him money for his troubles and the dude really is excited to go to California too.
Dolemite is going there to meet up with his partner in the sex trafficking business Queen Bee. A rival escort service owner named Joe Cavaletti is angry about losing business to Queenie so he kidnaps two of Dolemite's girls and forces Queen Bee to start working for him. So Dolemite must get his empire back... again, but first he must bang his lady friend Hurricane Annie. She tells Dolemite he is out of shape so they work out naked, but he gets bored and they get down to business.
Sheriff Beatty blames his wife's death on Dolemite so some other white cop dude hires Detective Pete Blakeley, the very best there is in Florida to take on the case. He happens to be black and the Sheriff doesn't like that much but doesn't really have a choice. This Detective wants to capture Cavaletti anyway so off they go. Meanwhile Cavaletti is busy killing guys in the street for no reason and bossing Queenie around.
Dolemite gathers some intel about a torture den that Cavaletti has from some druggie guy, and finds out that Cavaletti has a woman who would know where it is and she lives in Cavaletti's house. So Dolemite seduces her with some art of a white woman in a passionate embrace with a black man and she is transported to a dreamworld where a bunch of strong black men come out of a toy box to please her and go down a slide with her. Yes this really happens. Meanwhile in the real world Dolemite is "pumping" the info out of her. We learn why he is called The Human Tornado. He is so good at sex that he literally brings the room down around them.
What follows in the finale is Dolemite's men infiltrating a party Cavaletti is throwing with the help of Queenie's girls, and Dolemite sneaks into the torture den where he saves the girls with the power of his killer kung fu. You would have to see it to understand why it's so hilarious so just look it up. The fight scenes are sped up and Dolemite makes the most amazing kung fu noises ever recorded. There is a little bit more, but I'll just say that evil is mostly punished and Dolemite lives on.
The Human Tornado succeeds at surpassing the original film in every possible way. The acting, the music, and the action is all better. It is also more focused and much more funny. This movie is so ridiculously watchable. It really is the best Rudy Ray Moore has to offer. The only issue is that it makes a bit more sense if you've seen the original so you can't introduce people with this unless you brief them a little on the history of the character. It also seems like some of the story was cut out but that is okay because the movie really seems like an appropriate length. Seriously though, this is the movie that made Dolemite a legend for me. Go see it, the movie has it all and Dolemite once again proves he is the baddest there ever was or ever will be.
